The other kind of love

Ah, February. The month commonly associated with love because of Valentine’s Day.

The stores flood with food, flowers, and apparel in various shades of red, pink, and chocolate. Oddly, I think it fills more of us with dread than delight: singles feel conspicuous in a culture focused on couples, and those in relationships feel the pressure to meet a social standard for expressing affection—both financially and emotionally. 

As Americans, I think we’ve become too focused on romantic love. Perhaps even our church culture has become too myopic about it as well? Affinity groups for couples… sermons on marriage… and more. Please don’t mistake me, if we are married, we should absolutely fortify those relationships through whatever resources we have. Yet an overemphasis on couple-hood creates undue pain for our single friends and—perhaps more importantly—distorts our view of the Body. 

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No More Worms for Christmas Dinner

It’s the Christmas tradition I’m ready to ditch. 

Living away from extended family means most of our holiday celebrations are either shared with friends or spent with merely my four fellow Holmbergians. More often than not, it’s the latter. As an introvert, that’s often okay with me. Other times it produces a subtle but steady pain, similar to a headache that you don’t quite realize you have until you find yourself spitting nails at your spouse — utterly unprovoked.  Read More

Can you judge a family by their Christmas card? Should you?

Her disgust was vocal and overt.

BerriesMy friend and I had both received Christmas cards from a third friend. Over the course of the preceding year, we had walked through some significant and painful territory in the life of our mutual friend: a miscarried pregnancy, a grave illness in her extended family, and an arduous household move. Yet the Christmas greeting that arrived in our mailboxes mentioned none of these; rather it was graced with a smiling family photo and written sentiments that noted only pleasurable travel experiences, milestones achieved by children, and professional successes. My friend was visibly agitated by the dissonance between what we had observed in person and what was recorded on paper.  Read More

Bad news. Good news. Or both?

I feel a little badly about saying this to you. Even just for thinking it, really.

But I don’t feel so badly that I won’t say it. I’ve been tracking the career of an author with some 10+ Lifeway-published book titles to her name and a prolific speaking calendar. Her trajectory is one that I admittedly envy. (I’m not proud of that, but there you have it.)

Today, in my inbox, I received notice that her next big event was cancelled. Cancelled. The reason? Lack of interest and registration. Not enough attendees to justify putting on the event.

So, here’s the part I feel badly about:  Read More